Let the Billing Begin

Our first bill but certainly not our last

It was a hassle.  It was a nail biting, stress filled 11th hour experience.  And there were many sleepless worry filled nights.  But getting Jeff on to my medical insurance was worth every hoop we jumped through.

Every day people stop me to ask how Jeff's doing.  And I must confess I love getting to say, "He's Great!". Because he is.  Yeah his back is hurting him and he's still sore but he's up and puttering around the house doing what he can to ward of the boredom.  Dishes.  Laundry.  Vacuuming.  Cats.  I could so get used to having a househusband!

This weekend our wonderful neighbor Chris came over to build the frames for our shed doors.  Jeff got some much needed guy time.  He couldn't do any heavy lifting or hammering but he did get to use small power tools.  More importantly he got to feel like he accomplished something.

Later in the day our friend Ernie, and then later still, Adam came over and the "boys" played video games until 3am.  I would complain except I am just as guilty of gaming into the wee hours of the night.

This weekend was also Homecoming for my oldest son.  And because there is no danger of him ever reading this blog I am going post the following picture of him and his beautiful girlfriend.

He can thank his grandpa for the hair

The More Things Change

You know the rest.  We've been home for a week now and the Seattle weather has finally caught up with us.  My gosh it's been beautiful outside, until today that is.

Jeff is going a little stir crazy.  It's hard being told you can't do something that you love, namely driving a car, even if it just for a short time.  We're settling into the new routine.  Weekly blood tests and more frequent doctors appointments.  It's like getting a preview of life as an octogenarian. 

Before we left, I had some plants I was suppose to, well, plant.  In the rush and general craziness I didn't get them into the ground and now it's a bit late.  The Mock Orange tree would probably survive if I planted it now but the Passion Fruit vine wouldn't.  So this week I gave Jeff the task of designing and building cheap insulated boxes I can put these two plants in so I can keep them on the back deck over the winter.  I'd keep them in the house except our new kitten, Shamrock, has decided it's great fun to try and climb them and eat the leaves.

When I came home on Tuesday there was an odd contraption leaning against the wall in the kitchen.  In any other house this might elicite the standard question, "What's this and where did it come from?".  In our house, I take the Wait & See approach to these kind of odd additions.  Sometimes it's better not to know.

Yesterday, after we came home from the doctor's I got to find out what the new addition was.  An insulation board cutter.  You see, Jeff needed a way to cut insulated panels to build the boxes I had requested. And because he can't use any of his power tools for the next few weeks he had to make a tool he could use.  He built a frame that can span the width of the panels, added a wire to the bottom of it and electrified it.  He hooked the whole thing up to a switch box he made and Voila - electrified foam insulation knife.

I have pictures and will add them later.  I am on my lunch break and don't have time to figure out why they want to load upside down and sidways.

Basically it's nice to know Jeff is keeping busy.  I am ignoring the fact that he's keeping busy by playing with electricity.

Little Italy, Cleveland Style

Jeff is ready to rock Little Italy

Before we left the hospital we received a booklet of exercises Jeff needed to do.  High on that list was walking.  So today we followed the doctor's orders.

Jeff was moving slow but steady.  We took a number of breaks along the way which gave me time to take photos and to figure out how the hell to get to Little Italy.  In a patented Tess move we left the house with only a vague idea of where we were going and no idea how to get there.  As evidenced by the picture above, we made it.

I packed pain pills and his Warfarin, blood thinners, in case we were still out and about when it was "Pill Time".   Speaking of pills, look at the lovely collection of souvenirs we picked up at the pharmacy on our way out of the hospital yesterday.

It can be overwhelming, so last night while Jeff got some much needed sleep I wrote on each bottle what the medicine was for and when to take it.

Jeff goes in for a blood draw tomorrow to test is INR levels.  This test checks the bloods ability to clot.  It is the last time we'll have to go to the hospital before we hop on a plane to go home tomorrow.  Once we're home Jeff will need to go in and have his levels checked twice a week.  Eventually he'll be able to go in once a month or even less.  The drawback of the mechanical valve is that it can elevate the risk of blood clots which can stick to the valve and hinder its movement and do all the other bad things blood clots do.  So the blood thinner is one pill we don't want to miss.

Once we finally found Little Italy, we also found that it's on the only hill in Ohio.  Not a steep hill but it certainly was an incline.  Oops.  Jeff took it well.  I think the sight of the pastry shop half way up the hill gave him the added purpose and drive he needed.

None of these are on the new diet

We decided to go in for lunch and torture ourselves by sitting next to the case of forbidden food pictured above.  

Okay moving on and wiping the drool off my chin. 

 I took this picture thinking about how free flying balloons make you look up, just like a good church steeple does. 

In case you forgot which ethnic neighborhood you were visiting

So many electrical lines

The walk back to the bus stop was pretty slow going.  It was hot and Jeff was wearing out.  When we made it back to University Circle we found a Starbucks (3rd one in all of Cleveland) where we sat down to take a break.  It was nice having my travel partner back.  I feel complete once again.

Life's path is easier traveled with someone you love and who loves you in return

Our Last Full Day

View out the small bedroom window this morning.

I love when the ivy turns pink, orange and magenta

.It's our last full day here in Cleveland.  We're trying to decide what to do with it.   I think we'll head to Little Italy.  Mostly we'll just take it slow and see how much Jeff feels like doing.

He is covered in circles and looks like he got into a fight with an octopus.  We spent about an hour this morning rubbing the sticky goo off his skin so most of his circles are gone.  He still has the one large circle from where they, to quote a nurse, "Paddled him back to life."  I then asked her, "If they paddled him why isn't his butt all red?"  Jeff laughed, she just looked confused.  My humor doesn't work on everyone.

I may have more pictures to post later today if anyone is interested.  By the way, Jeff has already started 'working'.  Yeah he and Reed talked shop for awhile yesterday while we waited for 5 freaking hours to get the final discharge paperwork.

Sigh.

Oh, one more thing for those of you who may be interested.  The image below is a St. Jude Valve.  This is the valve that Jeff now has clicking away in his chest.

A Free Man

A-OK

We have a celebrity guest blogger tonight.  Yup Jeff Wilkinson, who has just been set free from the confines of room 16.

"Whatssssup?!  I am glad I am out of the hospital.  I made it up three flights of stairs without falling or stopping.   Now if you'll excuse me I am going to bed to get some sleep where no one can wake me up all night - Just Checking to See How You Are"

So there you have it.  A man of simple words glad to be set free once again.

Matchsticks

This post has next to nothing to do with Jeff.  If you are looking for an update skip this one.

Our apartment is almost 150 years old.  When the building was built in the 1860s it had 12 apartments.  Each apartment had a smaller apartment inside of it with a separate entrance for servants.  Sometime in the 1950s the apartments were cut in half and what was the servants apartments were turned into rentable units of their own.  The apartment Jeff and I are in is one of those 'new' units.

Jeff couldn't sleep the 1st night we were here and he wouldn't tell me why.  I figured it was a new bed, new space, new sounds, whatever that threw him off and pretty much forgot about it.

Tuesday night last week when I came from visiting Jeff at the ICU I found a white wood matchstick on the bed.  I tossed it away.  The landlord and his assistant had been in earlier in the day, changing sheets and taking out the trash.  The assistant smokes so I thought the matchstick had probably fallen out of his pocket while he was making the bed.

Wednesday night has I sat down at the dining room table to eat dinner, I pushed some change out of the way and saw a white wood matchstick.  Did I throw the one from last night away or did I set it on the table thinking I might use it for the candle that was here when we moved in?  I wasn't sure so I put it in my purse.  I don't know why I put it in there.  Guess I figured that I would remember doing that over just tossing it in a garbage can.

Thursday morning I woke got out of bed and as I left the bedroom I smelled sulfur. Okay weird for some people but that smell is familiar to me because the acne medication my older son uses has a sulfury smell.  I had packed a tube of it with me because I break out under when I stress out.  When I got in the bathroom I checked my face in the mirror to see where the medicine I'd obviously left on me was at.  Couldn't find it.  Went back to the bedroom, smelled the sulfur again as I passed by the kitchen, didn't smell it in the bedroom.  Back to the kitchen, was it from the ancient stove?  No.  Something outside the window?  Didn't seem to be coming from there.  Took off my tee shirt, maybe it was on the collar.  Didn't see anything.  Oh well it was probably somewhere on my shirt and I just didn't see it.

Friday night I get into bed and picked up my Kindle from the bedside table.  I sleep better after I've read for a while at night.  Under my Kindle is a white wooden matchstick.  I had put the Kindle on the side table the night before after I was done reading and it sat there all day while I was at the hospital with Jeff.  Was it the same matchstick?  I remembered putting the last one in my purse.  I thought about getting out of bed to check.  Thought better of it.  Put the matchstick down on the side table, read for a while.  Picked up the matchstick and told it, "You can stay here if this is where you want to be.  Just don't burn the place down while I am here."  I shut off the light and went to sleep.  Had the best night's sleep of my entire 'vacation'.

Saturday night, matchstick is still on the side table and the apartment has not burned down.  Slept great.

Sunday as Jeff and I are walking the halls I decide he's feeling so much better I am gonna lay this matchstick story on him.  He listens, doesn't say I am crazy and then asks if I remember how he couldn't sleep that first night.

"Sulfur smell?"  I asked

"No."

He then tells me that sometime during that first night he woke up face down on the bed feeling like he couldn't breathe.  When he tried to push himself up he couldn't move.  He started to yell but couldn't get a breath.  Couldn't move.  Couldn't breathe.  He freaked out.  He said finally whatever was on top of him got off and he could roll over.  Didn't see anything, didn't smell anything, didn't hear anything.  Also didn't sleep the rest of the night.  He didn't have any problems after that.

Are my matchsticks and his "attack" related?  I don't know.

I found that first matchstick today in the bottom of my purse.

The Seattle Cure

After spending almost 24 hours here, I can't honestly fathom how Jeff has survived 6 days.  The boredom alone is a killer.  My back will never be the same after sleeping on this futon.  The original plan was for him to be released yesterday.  Since when have things gone as planned?  I am hearing that will be today.  He's downstairs somewhere getting an echocardiogram right now.  Then we'll meet with a doctor and know for sure.

Sunrise this morning as seen from Jeff's room

Yesterday his neck was killing him, he couldn't get comfortable and he started getting a killer headache that was messing with his vision.  He was trying to power through the day without Percocet.  I think he was afraid of running out come bedtime like he did the night before. Around 11 he finally did take one, and his chest stopped hurting him.  However his neck was still causing him problems and there was still that odd headache.

Throughout the day various nurses would come in and try to start a new IV line since his current one had "expired".  They aren't using this IV, it's there should the time come when they need it.  Just to add to the general misery, his veins have all decided they are tired of getting poked and prodded and have gone on strike.  They either can't be found, collapse upon encountering a needle or refuse to give blood.  It was damnedest thing to see.  The nurses all eventually gave up and extended the expiration date on his current IV.

After one of our walks as Jeff sat with a cool cloth over his head and moaned I asked him if he would like to get rid of his headache.  He arched an eyebrow at me and said, "I don't think this door has a lock."

"You don't need that for your headache.  What you need is the Seattle Cure.  Caffeine.  You my dear are suffering from caffeine withdrawal."

I brought him a cup of strong black tea.  10 minutes later, headache gone he was practically racing me down the hallways.  Joking with the orderlies and back to being himself.  He was so much improved we got stopped in the hallways by people who'd seen him over the last couple of days.  His color was better.  He smiled easier.  His speech was clearer.  His natural personality was coming out.  The doctors started talking about finally letting him go home.

The Seattle Cure. It's a beautiful thing.

Walk About

Yesterday and today were spent at the hospital with Jeff.  I hope no one worried because I hadn't posted anything.

Today was rough.  Okay let me qualify that a bit.  This morning was rough.  Jeff's neck is stiff, which is giving him headaches.  He's trying to stretch out the time between the pain pills, silly boy,  So when I arrived this morning he was an hour overdue for pain medication and obviously in need of it.  He hasn't slept much still and he's getting a bit stir crazy.   He is in desperate need of some Legos.

Once his pills arrived I got him up and out for a walk around the hallways.  Moving around is so much better then sitting, or worse laying in bed all day.

Ready for a stroll

That thing in his mouth is "exercise equipment" for his lungs.  Jeff has started taking it with him on walks and using it as he goes along.  The nurses are very impressed.  He's such a show off.

After our walk, he took a nap.  Showing off for nurses his hard work.  Wink.

While he slept I took my own walk about, and explored the hospital campus.  It was another warm day, 77 I think, so I stayed pretty close to the main building.

Main entrance as seen from the water garden garden across the street

Entrance to the Glickman Tower

Atrium between the Glickman Tower and the Cardiac Center

There are skybridges everywhere

I was fascinated by the facade of this building.  These bricks are not painted.

After my walk I bought lunch and when back upstairs to check on Jeff.  He was still sleeping.  I woke him up so he could eat his lunch, which had arrived by then.  He was still feeling kind of crappy but he made an effort to eat some food.

After lunch, a physicians assistant came in to remove his stitches (from where the drain tubes went in) and to take out the temporary pace wires from his chest.  Stitches, not to bad.  Wires, horrible.  Well duh!  You put two 30 gauge wires next your heart, run them down your chest cavity to just under your sternum and then have someone pull them out.  Youch!   The good news is, now he can take a shower.

After the PA left, we met with a physical therapist who gave us a book of exercises Jeff should try doing over the next couple of months.   He's started Jeff on some shoulder shrugs to help loosen up the muscles in his back and neck.  When he left Jeff took another nap.  I took the following photo with his permission but I am warning everyone right now.  It's not pretty and if  you're squeamish close your eyes and scroll down past it.

I made it black and white to limit the impact. 

Okay all better now.

Before dinner we went out for one more walk.  This time I took him up the roof so he could get
some sunshine and see the views.  He felt kind of like a mole but I think he appreciated seeing something other then the same hallways he's been walking down for two days now.

Checking out the view

The trees are just starting to change color

Aaaargh!  Bright Light!

It's a big world out there Pa

I have been trying to get a pictures of these guys since I first saw them on Tuesday.  I wish their wives and the rest of group were with them today.  I saw them the first time as I was waiting for Jeff while he was being prepped for surgery.  Oddly a valet was leading them into the hospital.  I went to the front of the hospital as fast as I could but I did not see a valet parking a horse and buggy anywhere.   Late Tuesday night as I was leaving the hospital I saw them again.  The women got into a shuttle bus for The Comfort Inn and the men were waiting on a cab.  I never thought about how the Amish traveled before.  Did they fly here?  Take a cab?   How far away is nearest Amish colony (is it called a colony?  Town?  Settlement?  Farm?) from Cleveland?

So that was our Saturday.  How was yours?

Step Back

Wade Lagoon

Once Jeff was settled into his new digs I left to grab some lunch and do some more exploring.  My objective today was Case Western University and the Cleveland Museum of Art.

It became abundantly clear to me that I was spending too much time focused on Jeff and worrying over things that are out of my control.   I needed to step back and gain some perspective.  And what better way to do that then to walk a mile to the University in 80 degree weather and sweat my ass off.  I don't always thing things through.  But I made it.

Methodist Church

 What would a day be with a picture of another church?

Judson Manor - A retirement home

Sidewalk leading to the art museum

More sidewalk art

I didn't know if I would be allowed to take any photos inside the museum.  There were a dozen guards and docents I could have asked but chose not to.  After all how do you choose what to photograph and what not to when everything in there is a work of art. HeHe.

Well I held fast to my, No Photos, rule until I got to this room.

Medieval armor and weaponry.  Yeah baby!

So I tried to be all stealth like and take photos without anyone seeing.  I am sure the guards watching me on the ceiling cams were highly amused.  But good lord people, this geek girl squealed with joy upon seeing this place.  Halberds, claymores, and flintlocks oh my.  So flintlocks came along after the medieval period, whatever.  Don't worry William I have  more photos to share with you when I get home.  But here's one more to tide you over.

After I left the museum I really wanted to go play some World of Warcraft but settled for walking to the Botanical Gardens. I traded in Rogues for Roses.  Sacrifices must be made sometimes.

For $8.50 I was allowed to wander around a tropical rain forest, a desert landscape, and many outside gardens as well.  I would imagine this place is even more beautiful in the spring and summer.  I am very much looking forward to sharing all my photos with Janet, my gardening guru and with my mom, who still can't believe I have started to enjoy working in my yard.

Here are a couple of my favorite pictures from today.

I didn't realize there was a bird in this shot until I got home

I have a feeling this is going to be in my yard one day

Sitting down here beneath the trees, I almost felt like I was back home

I feel alive and refreshed again.  Jeff's progress has energized me and I am not as freaked out as I was.  Sorry if last night's post upset anyone.  Sometimes private fears don't need to be made public.  But this is my life and it isn't always pretty.  And sometimes when you share those scary thoughts, they aren't so scary anymore.

My love to all of you.  Blessing on us all.

Step Down

Jeff sleeping in the ICU

If you've ever spent any time in an ICU you know how loud it is.  If you haven't, consider yourself lucky, and take my word for it.  Noise cancelling headphones are good for airplanes and noisy hospitals.  I think Jeff slept the best when he had these on.

Being nothing if not persistent, once I left yesterday Jeff continued to badger people about why is back hurt.  He finally found someone who told him.  He had a drain tube inserted behind his lung inside the chest cavity.  Every time he inhaled it was pushed by his lung into his back.  Once he knew why it hurt he could concentrate on other things.  Always has to know Why.  Life with an engineer.

Jeff's chariot awaits

Today was moving day.  Drain tubes were gone so were some of his IV's and Jeff was ready to go.  Only one problem.  Our mover, Bill was on his lunch break.   So I sat back down and continued to work, Jeff went back to sleep and we waited on Bill.

Jeff and nurse Eric, waiting on Bill

Once the infamous Bill arrived we moved into the Step Down ward.  Jeff has his own private room, #16 and a view of the Pulmonary Clinic and Case Western University.  It also has a fold out futon for guests, a.k.a. Me.

Arrival at Room 16

Guest bed and TV

Nice View huh?

Jeff will stay here for a few more days.  Right now we don't know how many that will be.  It's a day by day decision that is made by his cardiologist and Dr. Svensson.  Before we leave we'll meet with an after care nurse who will give us instructions on what to expect and what to do after we leave the hospital. 

Jeff is making tremendous strides.  I can't believe the changes I see in him everyday, even from just the morning to the afternoon.  He doesn't use the pain medicine button at all.  Whatever dose they have him on works great.  He's concerned about a slight tremor in his hands.  The cardiologist doesn't know what it is but will keep an eye on it.  It's probably an effect of the anesthesia still leaving his body.  He has full sensation in all areas and mobility.  He is very motivated to get out and return to his normal life.

Cheers from Jeff

Confessions

• The creaky floor has moved from quirky to annoying
• I have found the least creaky areas and now travel on tip-toe next to all the walls and take a zig-zag route to get anywhere
• I have only paid for 1/3 of the bus trips I've taken
• I am terrified of this mechanical valve.  My ex's mother-in-law had one and died after a trip to the dentist caused an infection on the valve
• Someone left a stethoscope on a chair on the roof and I took it
• I used the hairdryer to warm the bed before I went to sleep last night
• I miss my sons
• I left the hospital tonight because Jeff had been asleep for two hours and I was bored
• I am enjoying traveling around alone and taking pictures
• Jeff can hear that valve click and for the rest of our lives I know I am going to hear him complain about it
• I feel guilty for thinking about that last one
• I don't want to do this again in 20 years
• The chances of Jeff dying during the next surgery goes from 1 in 1000 to 1.5 in 100
• I don't know if life is ever going to be normal again
• I am afraid this constant fear in me is going to be the new normal

Life in the ICU

Removing the breathing tube

Trying to get comfortable

Well I didn't have to use my story.  Either someone had told him or he heard the mechanical clicking noise the valve makes when it opens and closes.  I think he heard it.

When I came it he was awake and immediately motioned his hand he wanted a pen.   The hunky nurse who looks like a young George Michael gave me pen and paper.  Jeff wrote, without even looking at the paper "mechanical" and gave me a questioning look.
"Yes honey.  Dr. Svensson couldn't repair your valve.  He had to put in the mechanical one we talked about."
Jeff 's shoulders slumped a bit and he nodded.  I knew he was disappointed but there was nothing to be done.

Because of laying flat for so long Jeff's back was really hurting him.  He was having a hard time breathing.  Deep inhales hurt his shoulder blades.  Unfortunately in order to get off the breathing tube you have to show you can breathe on your own.  For over an hour he fought against the pain and his own gag reflex trying to take deep steady breaths.  He was finally rewarded and I snuck a quick pictures from behind all the equipment.

Once the tube was gone they hooked him up with one of those buttons you get to push to give yourself pain medication.  They also tried to help him find a more comfortable position to lay down in.  Everything they did hurt him.  I hid in the corner and tried to shut out the sound of Jeff crying in pain. 

Finally they found the right way him to lay and Jeff started breathing normal and actually started to look relaxed.  What he was actually doing was analyzing why his back hurt more than his chest.  Everyone that came in the room was questioned, "My back hurts, why does my back hurt?  When I inhale my shoulders hurt, why?"  The answers were all the same, "It's normal, you've been strapped flat down to a bed for almost 24 hours. You're back is going to hurt."  When he wouldn't do the breathing test for the respiratory nurse because he was too focused on figuring out why his back hurt it.  I snapped.

"Jeff, leave it.  It doesn't matter why your back hurts.  It hurts!  End of story.  Now shut up and start breathing."

The nurse to her credit, hid her smile, and stifled her giggles before Jeff looked up at her.  She also let him off the hook on the test and told him she'd come back in an hour when the pain meds were working.

After all that Jeff settled down and started to fall asleep.  I took that as my cue and left.  I walked half of the way home.  The sun is out and it's really very beautiful.  I am on my way back in a minute. 

Wish us both luck.

Window of the Baptist church next to The Cleveland Clinic

Door of the Baptist church

Tower rising over the tree tops

Close up of the tower window